In an incredible development of events Thunder Bay Storm's stadium has
begun to fall apart and been demolished, their owner has uncovered
secret negotiations with Mississauga officials and have moved out of
Thunder Bay for good.
Earlier this week a large chunk of concrete weighing about 7 tons fell
from the roof of the stadium on to the field. Luckily it was in the
middle of the night and no one was hurt. The playing field was seriously
damaged though and was scheduled to take a few weeks to make it at least
playable. "All we heard was a huge BOOM and the whole stadium shook."
said a security guard who was on his night shift.
City officials then decided to implode the stadium and unbelievably,
without the consent of Storm owner Jesse Gouldson. They assumed that
Gouldson would settle with playing at a high school field which only
seats 1,230 people. Although every game would be a sure sellout Gouldson
was quite unhappy about learning this while on vacation in Vermont. "I
can't believe they would do this! It's incomprehensible! I was honestly
at a loss for words and I've always got something to say!" Gouldson told
reporters. "It's a good thing I had some other plans..."
Meanwhile, in Mississauga, a suburb of Toronto, there was a huge
building being constructed right smack dab in the middle of downtown.
Local officials told everyone that it was going to be a mega-mega-mega
plex with over 100 movie screens. The locals were quite happy with this
and thought nothing of it. Little did they know that PVBL baseball was
soon coming to their town due to negotiations between Gouldson and the
crooked politicians who lied to them.
"Honestly, the paperwork was about to be done. The fact that the
stadium collapsed and then was destroyed only accelerated my plans. No
big deal." Gouldson said at a press conference to uncover his "new"
team. He pulled down a drape and there was a logo of the words "Maple
Dogs" in red with very stylised text. Thus the new name of the former
Thunder Bay Storm: The Mississauga Maple Dogs. "What's a maple dog?"
some reporter asked. "I have no idea. It just has a great ring to it."
Gouldson explained. "There are a few details to be sorted out but it's
basically a done deal." he alos said.
The players will be arriving in Mississauga soon after winning their
last two games against Ann Arbour by a combined score of 33-9. They'll
train on their new grass field in an Astrodome-type stadium called The
Pound.
After weeks of rumours Gouldson has finally moved and is looking to
bust out in the next half of the season and is looking forward to Marty
Cordova's return in time for the playoff run. So next time you look at
the ever competitive Kirk division and see the Mississauga Maple Dogs,
just remember that it's the same old owner and same old team... but in a
new town with a new nickname.
"That Jesse THOMAS Gouldson is the MAN! What a great GUY! GO MISSISSAUGA
MAPLE DOGS!"
-A Mississauga sports fan, excited about the team and disspelling
rumours of Mr. Gouldson's gender.
