Chrabascz apologizes, among other things today July 12, 1998
Hartford (AP)- Hartford Whalers GM Jeremy Chrabascz issued the following
statement:
I would like to issue an official, public apology to Mr. Dan Shapiro, GM and
Owner of the Punxatawny Groundhogs for recent remarks. Although sources had
visual confirmation of Shapiro spending an enormous amount of private time with
our Attorney General, if he denies it and takes personal offense, there is no
need to push this to the limit. Only Dan knows the truth and it is not my
place to make public what I may or may not know. The fact of the matter is
that Dan has taken offense to many of my remarks and it was never my intent.
Almost all of my remarks were meant to be received light-heartedly. Thus, Dan,
I apologize. I hope I have not caused you, your family or your organization
any undue grief.
In OTHER news...
The suspect in the "lewd acts" case in Duluth has been identified. 26-yr-old
Jason Chrabascz, older brother of Hartford Whalers GM Jeremy Chrabascz, was
charged today with various counts of disturbing the peace, insulting police
officers, trespassing, public intoxication, indecent exposure, etc. Jason had
apparently "gone off the deep end," as his family put it. The boys' mother,
Darlene, put it this way, "Jason was always extremely jealous of Jeremy. If it
wasn't Jeremy getting all the girls it was Jeremy getting the great grades. I
knew he'd snap someday but, as a mother, you always pray and hope for the best.
Unfortunately, Jeremy's recent success with the Whalers and ESPN drove Jason
into alcohol abuse and various criminal activities. He has gone so far, in his
jealousy, to impersonate Jeremy on occasion. We, as a family, are convinced
that Jason is living in his own little dream world and alternate reality now.
I pray to the Lord every day for his recovery." Jason Chrabascz is expected to
receive a suspended sentence and extensive hours of community service and
psychological evaluation. No psychological experts could be reached but noted
sex therapist Dr. Ruth Westheimer had this to say, "Jason Chrabascz has a very
clear cut case of penis envy. He has gone so far in his fantasies as to wish
to and pretend to be his brother, Jeremy. It is probably a good thing that
Jeremy's wife, Cathy, has had little to no contact with Jason." The family as
a whole has been deeply saddened and embarassed by the whole affair. Jason
himself only said this in his defense at his sentencing, "All I had were some
wine coolers for Christ's sake. And that A-Rod got is a real asshole. He kept
asking me to play park the porpoise with him, if you know what I mean." The
judge didn't. Jason was held without bail.
In OTHER OTHER news...
Regretabbly, despite all the ado, Whalers Manager Jeremy Chrabascz will be
unable to partake in All-Star festivities. Chrabascz not only has final exams
next week but a friend's wedding to attend this weekend. Thus, Chrabascz
defers all managerial duties for the game to Dan and/or Matt.
In OTHER OTHER OTHER news...
Duluth Owner Andy Lund has yet to respond to Chrabascz's civil suit against
him but all paperwork and motions have been filed and the trial will proceed
unless and out-of-court settlement can be reached. Chrabascz is accusing Lund
and his newspaper the National Enquirer, of both public slander and libel.
